Off to a better place

Mm.. In fact, it's the best place on Earth :)

* * *

InsyaAllah I'm off to Tanah Haram esok.
Flight will land in Jeddah. And we're making our way to Madinah first, by bus.

Will spend about 3 days in Madinah.. By Tuesday afternoon, insyaAllah akan gerak ke Makkah pulak.

Should be back in KL after 2 weeks from tomorrow, dengan izin Allah..

* * *

Berdebar-debar pun ada, also rasa tak sabar-sabar tu takyah cakap ler..
Silap-silap malam ni aku takleh tido.

* * *

Panjang umur, and ada rezeki, I'll be back, and will be writing more. Or meet up with some of you. Or sms. Or call. Hehe..

Doakan lah aku & parents ku sihat dan selamat, dan dapat buat umrah yang diterima-Nya. Doakan gak we all kuat tubuh badan untuk buat banyak-banyak ibadah.

Until then, take care everyone. Semoga sentiasa dalam peliharaan Allah. InsyaAllah.


Love,
Yam

Forgiveness: Asking.. & receiving..

Do you know how good it feels to finally forgive someone?

* * *

I guess you could say that I've been doing some soul seaching during the past couple of weeks - some of them long overdue.

Apart from the meeting with the ex, I've had another closure yesterday.. No, it's not another ex :P
An old... friend.. whom (at one time) I didn't exactly want to befriend.. Yam, you silly girl you..

And now, somehow it felt like a burden has been lifted off my shoulders.

I'm not sure what was it I was carrying that has been weighing me down: guilt? disappointment? anger? disillusionment? frustration?

Probably a bit of each..
I thought I was entitled to all those feelings.
But thinking back, maybe I over-reacted in some issues. Or maybe I didn't use my head very much..

* * *

Forgiveness.. this one probably doesn't come easy.

The one doing the forgiving might be tempted to keep on dwelling on the other party's mistakes and wrongdoings. Kiranya.. makin diingat.. makin susah nak maafkan la tu..

The one asking for forgiveness.. well, for most people, it's sooo difficult to admit that one has actually made a mistake. It takes courage to say "I'm sorry..".

Hehe.. didn't Sir Elton John (and Blue) sang "Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word" ??

Blessed Friday :)

InsyaAllah it's going to be one - a very blessed Friday indeed :D

* * *

Next Saturday (not tomorrow, ok..), I'm going to Makkah for umrah. With my parents. InsyaAllah we're flying off to Jeddah, and will be taking a bus to Madinah. After a few days in Madinah, we'll be making our way to Makkah. (we haven't attended the briefing yet, so.. not sure what's the exact itenary is like..)

I guess I was initially nervous about it. 'Why?' you ask? Mmm.. probably becoz sendiri sedar dah buat banyak dosa eheks.. (seriously ni..)

Now.. I'm still a bit nervous, but I'm also very much looking forward to it. Macam.. dah tak sabar-sabar lak nak sampai ke sana.

Tomorrow (Saturday), we're attending a 'taklimat umrah' somewhere in PJ. When Mak Abah performed their Hajj back in 2003, they did it through this travel agency. And when they went to Makkah again last year, they also used the same agency. I guess they were satisfied with the accomodation and services provided - which made them came back for more. And this time they brought me along with them hehe...

Please doa-kan my ability & strength & perseverance to perform as many umrah, as many tawaf, as many solat, as many zikir, as many recitation of al-Quran, as many ibadah.. as I would 'terdaya' while I'm there..

To a certain friend, this post is not intended to make you (more) jealous or anything. I just felt it's time to write it. Please don't hate me, ya..

To Were, who's departing for umrah tonight, semoga dikurniakan kekuatan dan ketenangan untuk beribadah banyak-banyak di Makkah and Madinah. My doa and love are with you always.

* * *

Have a blessed Friday, everyone. And may your weekend be equally rewarding.

Closure.

I had a closure last night..

* * *

Met up with the ex for supper.

I texted him earlier yesterday, to let him know that I'm going for umrah next week. Didn't expect him to call me up almost immediately after that. And even more surprised when he asked to meet up for supper.

It was.. good seeing him again.
We didn't exactly ended it in bad terms (bergaduh or anything) - just that.. things were left hanging.. We kinda drifted apart.

And after 2 1/2 years, to see him again.. it certainly didn't feel like it has been 2 years plus. He looked almost the same. And somehow.. it wasn't as awkward as I imagined it would be. We talked. And laughed. Sheesh.. he talked about our first date. Chaits. Hhehe...

I didn't ask him why. I don't know if I want to know why things happen the way it happened.
I just wanted to apologise for.. everything I guess.
And he wanted to do the same - apologise. That's the reason for the meet up.

We exchanged stories. He did the talking more than half of the time. Seems like he had more things happening in his life - compared to boring ol' me LOLs..

He asked me: Bila Yam nak kawin?
I didn't have an answer to that..

I asked him the same question.
He said things have been complicated.

He asked me.. if I was waiting for him...
I said no.
Gosh I certainly didn't expect that question. It never entered my mind.
But afterwards, at home.. I thought about his question. Was I subconsciously still waiting for him? My heart tells me 'No'. But it felt weird thinking about it.
Hmm..

* * *

I forgive him. And I pray for his happiness, dunia dan akhirat. He is a good man. And he deserve good things, a good wife, and a good life.

Out of nowhere, came the SMS'es

Hmm..
I'm looking at my mobile screen. Received 3 weird SMS's from an unknown number. Replied to 2 of them, and almost replied the 3rd one when I decided that.. this is SO not worth it.

It started off with the 1st SMS of Boleh berkenalan?

I went like 'What the heck???' and replied Huh? Siapa ni?

Reply: Garangnya.sy su.ni sapa?nak kenal leh?awak nama apa? sj nak kwn.

I couldn't tahan and replied: Su? Mana dapat nombor ni?

Reply: Member kasi.ni sapa?sy study lg kat upsi

I typed this: "Eh hello. You got my number from yr friend, apsal tak tanya dia i ni siapa." But then I decided that it's just not worth it. Buang masa melayan benda-benda ni. There are other things far more significant that I should be focussing on.

* * *

Things I want to highlight:

(1) Isn't UPSI a place that produces future teachers for our nation? And I'm supposed to send my children to learn from this kind of cikgu??

(2) What's with this girl? At least I think it's a girl la. Nama Su.. kan? Unless it's a guy whose name is Suparman or Suharto or Suhairi and he prefers to be called Su lah. Then sorry, my mistake.

* * *

OK, tadi terpikir juga benda-benda lain nak tulis pasal topik ni. Now I just cannot be bothered with this trivial matter. Muahhahaha..!


Su, or whoever you are out there.. Please don't go on sending 'Boleh berkenalan?' sms'es to strangers. Some people out there actually WILL take advantage of your 'offer'.

Well... as for me, blogging about it is enough. Hehhe.. Not sure if it's called 'taking advantage' though :P

Letting go of the old stuff

I've recently given away 2 pairs of my telekung (the one used for prayers). They're both in excellent condition, and made of fine material. But.. I've been reluctant to wear them for quite some time dah.. Finally decided to give them away.

So today, Mak & I headed to Jln TAR / Masjid India area to window shop for replacement.

Found one pair that I really like, so I've decided to buy it. Although.. Mak mentioned that this one looked similar to one of the pairs I gave away.
LOLs..
I told Mak: "Well, I know it's different. Ni Yam beli pakai duit Yam sendiri."
Hihiihihih..

Unfortunately, bargaining is NOT my strong point. Hehehe.. my power of persuasion is soooo teruk. :P
And hence the reason for Mak coming along with me. Hehhehehe..

Hmm, actually I saw another pair of telekung that I thought looked nice, and the material seemed not bad too. I think I might go ahead and just buy it la..

* * *

I've recently decided to give up on something.

Previously, everytime I try to think of doing away with it, my head gets messed up. So, terus jadi malas nak fikir pasal benda ni.
I guess I've been in a state of denial for so long, it somehow became a norm.

However, recently.. I sat down and forced myself to seriously think about this matter.
And I've decided that.. it's time to give it up. I don't think it's wise to delay it any longer la..

* * *

I'm remembering a short story I came across a few days ago. I actually first read it a few years ago - but somehow that day I found that email again and re-read the story.. (Nour, it's that story I forwarded to you that day. I sent to Anne too)

If I can find it, I'll post it here. But for now.. I'll just tell you guys the lesson behind it:

Sometimes, we're so reluctant to let go of the small things in life..
While Allah might be waiting for us to set them free.. So that HE can give us the bigger rewards. More precious. More significant.
When HE gives us something, we have to give up some other things from our current possessions.

Let go of the little things. Let go of the small stuff.
So that HE can give us something more valuable in replacement.

* * *

I guess it's time to let some things go.

And make room for new ones...

Double standard?

It was after office hour. So the LRT was jammed-packed with people trying to get home as soon as possible.

The 2 women were talking almost non-stop - even all the way from the LRT station where I stood close enough to overhear almost everything..

I got a seat after Ampang Park.
And after Jelatek there was space in front of my seat in case anyone wants to move away from the doors.

The 2 women made their way to the available space, and I can hear them talking..

Woman A: Eh jom lah diri sini (while moving towards my seat)
Woman A: Aku paling tak suka berdiri in between orang tengah bercakap (nodding her head towards a couple of people standing near the doors). As if lah aku nak dengar their conversation.
Woman B: Yeah aku paham. Sama lah. Aku nak diri pun rasa rimas.
Woman A: Ha.. sambung tadi.. kau tau.. mamat tu kan.. blablabla


Enen..
Double standard betul laa minah2 ni.

Kau tak suka dengar orang borak2, pastu kau ingat orang lain suka benar ke dengar cerita korang? Pulak tu, citer benda-benda yang sungguh shallow dan remeh.
Kalau benda kau cakap tu intelek takpe jugak. Tambah sikit ilmu gue. Ini dok potpet-potpet mengata and mengutuk artis laa, kengkawan kat office laa.

Cakap sekuat hati lak tu. Ish..

Letih laa gue.

No wonder they moved away from those couple who were talking - they weren't able to talk loudly themselves!
Ekekekekeke...

Movie Review: The Lake House

My movie partner - Lene - and me.. well we sometimes do crazy things when it came to watching movies. 2 movies back-to-back sessions. Movie marathons of 3 movies in the same day. Hehe..

Last week Monday, we went ahead for a movie session after work. Neither of us give a bloody care if it was only Monday (beginning of work week), or that the next day (Tuesday) we were both working.. I guess you could say that we decided that both of us needed a break from work - well, at least for a couple of hours..

We watched The Lake House. Starring Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves. Place? TGV ler mana lagi hehe...

Hmm.. I've read a few reviews in the newspaper. And more often than not, they sound... negative. However, I refused to be swayed NOT to watch the movie. hehe...

* * *

My thoughts..

(1) It can be a bit confusing - as the movie keeps switching between Alex (Reeves) and Kate (Bullock) who happens to live on the same date, only 2 years apart. He's in 2004, and she's in 2006.

(2) The chemistry between Bullock and Reeves were soo good I felt like crying when she gave up (oops! did i give something away? :P)

(3) I actually did cry in a few scenes. Hmmmm... And yes, I saw Lene wiping her eyes too. Hahhaha!

(4) Some plots were a bit hanging - I agree that some questions were unanswered in the movie.

(5) I'd freak out completely if I were in Alex's or Kate's shoes. Able to communicate with someone from the future / past? How freaky is that?!

(6) I think Bullock and Reeves should get together in real life. Hhehehe..

* * *

My verdict?
Worth watching.

Of course, me being the hopeless romantic that I am, I'm biased towards this movie. What's not to? It's Reeves and Bullock together. Hehe.. I'm giving it a 7/10.

Honestly, you gotta watch this with an open mind. Many things didn't add up.
Didn't make sense at all.

But then, this is a movie about love.

And when did LOVE make any sense....?